voice

[tanjoubi]

Incredible! Simply incredible! Crime! Punishment! Death! Rebirth! The cycle of life in this Deadman Wonderland is both primitive and complex. I love it! I am eagerly looking forward to my stay here. It should prove to be most interesting!

But all that aside; my fellow inmates, I have one simple request of you all:

Tell me your dates of birth!

Comments

[goodgrace]

You don't know what an un-birthday is?
Oh, you poor thing.

[tanjoubi]

I don't believe there is any such thing.

[ ...he says in a vaguely threatening tone of voice. ]

[goodgrace]

Of course, it's a thing! You shouldn't doubt that on someone's un-birthday. That's rude.

I'll ellusinate -- I mean illuminate. Right. Anyway. See, statistically you have one birthday. Imagine that? One? Ha. So you have 364 un-birthdays, give or take a day for a leap year. See?

1/2

[tanjoubi]

[ GASP. ]

[tanjoubi]

[ ...but then. ]

Splendid, splendid! A reason to celebrate every day! Quite ingenious!

[goodgrace]

Thank you.

When's your birthday?

[tanjoubi]

[ BOISTEROUS LAUGHTER.

That is the only response he gives. ]

[goodgrace]

[ ....

rolls with it. HAHAHAHA ]

Must be your un-birthday too. We should celebrate immediately.

[tanjoubi]

I am baking a cake as we speak!

[goodgrace]

Splendid!

[tanjoubi]

Although in this case I suppose an un-cake would be more appropriate. Hmmm, perhaps a pineapple upside-down cake would suffice.

[goodgrace]

You can't un a cake! A cake is a cake. That's ridiculous. A pineapple upside down cake would be delicious though.

[tanjoubi]

Ha ha ha! It would, indeed.

Now, if you'd be so kind, what are the dates of your other un-birthdays?

[goodgrace]

Ehem. Well.. Starting tomorrow. [ INHALE ] December 30th, December 31st, January 1st, January 2nd, January 3rd, January 4th, January 5th, January 6th, January 7th... [ still going

his birthday isn't until November. :| ]

[tanjoubi]

[ He'll interrupt sometime in... March, then. ]

So many of them!

[goodgrace]

March 16th, March 17th, March 18th, Mar--- Yep. [ DEEP BREATH. GOD. ]

364, to be precise.

[tanjoubi]

Tell me, then! The date of the single day which is not your un-birthday!

[goodgrace]

Why would you want to know that? November 9th.

[tanjoubi]

Splendid, splendid! I look forward to celebrating that day above and beyond even the grandest of un-birthdays!

[goodgrace]

Grander than the grandest unbirthday? You can try.

[tanjoubi]

[ And he says in a low, sort of terrifying hissing voice, ]

I will succeed.

[goodgrace]

...Determined, I see.
You've got plenty of time to prepare.

[tanjoubi]

For the time being, happy un-birthday!

[goodgrace]

A very merry un-birthday to you too, good sir.